Farewell Talk

Hello brothers and sisters. It is so good to see you all here today. I want to say a huge thank you to everyone who went out of their way to be here and support me. I really appreciate it. It means a lot. My name is brother Jenkins, soon to be Elder Jenkins as a missionary called to serve in Lubbock Texas. I will begin at home MTC training on August 15th, and leave for provo shortly after to finish my training. When I first got my call I was asked a lot of times if I was disappointed in serving stateside. And at first I was a little because I lived in Texas for 11-ish years. But as I thought more about it, there is nowhere else I would rather go to teach this amazing gospel and be fed some of the best food. Texas has been a major part in my life and shaping who I am, so I am glad to be returning to a place I can call home. 



While preparing for this talk, I kept thinking about what thoughts and feelings and impressions I had while I worked on becoming a missionary. I have never felt more ready yet so unprepared for something in my entire life as much as I have felt while getting myself ready  to serve on my mission. I wish I could say that my whole life I have been training and waiting for this day, but I haven't always felt that serving a mission was something that I wanted to do. A couple months ago, while attending BYUI. I felt prompted and the need to work on my mission papers. At first, I thought it was just because my friends were getting their calls and I didn’t think much of it. Then I got the thought again and really started thinking about it. I didn’t exactly know why at the time, but I made the decision to go. Within a week, and on the very last day of the semester,  I turned my papers in. I didn’t tell anyone as I wanted it to be a surprise for my family. After getting home,  I asked myself “what made you want to serve?” and  “why did you change your mind?” The spirit touched me so strongly that It was because there are people out there who need my help, and need me to teach them, so they can feel loved and live with our father in heaven again but also so that I may feel the same. I felt so strongly that this was the right choice because at times I struggled to listen and feel my savior's love for me. 



My life has had many hard trials that have tested my testimony. As much as I love Texas, I have had some of the hardest experiences there. I cried with my family and was heartbroken as I watched a close family member struggle and battle through many addictions and decisions that led them to be in and out of my life. While trying to love them and support them through everything as much as we could, our family  lost our beautiful home to toxic black mold, causing us to live in hotels and apartments. After about a year of being pretty close to being homeless we decided to move to Utah and leave our home, most of our belongings and loved ones behind to receive support from family. As hard as this was, it felt like we got what we could to get back on our feet and start over. During my junior year of high school, My parents noticed that I had a severe decrease in my health and decided to take me to the doctors. Clinic after clinic, doctors struggled to find the root of the problem and I started to feel hopeless. Eventually we found a specialist that was able to explain that I had grown mold in my body and had other problems that would explain a long list of symptoms and issues I was having. I would have to undergo very long, painful and demanding procedures daily and weekly, leading me to feel very discouraged and sad. In need of help and support I turned to my friends only to find out that they have been spreading misinformation about me and treating me badly behind my back. More would go on to happen but I never felt more alone, broken, frustrated and dark In my entire Life. I felt that I had lost everything; my home, my health, my friends, myself, and worst of all my testimony. I wanted to give up. 



One night as I was lying awake feeling bad for myself, I felt prompted to look at my patriarchal blessing I received many years ago and have not read for a while. Having not felt the spirit in some time I questioned this thought, ignored it  and tried to fall back asleep. The prompting came back, only this time it was so much louder and so strong it nearly brought me to my feet. I searched through my room and found my blessing and began to read it. Halfway through I just started crying, I'm not usually a crier (might bite my words here) but full tears that have been built up over the years ran down my face as I read. Feelings of peace, comfort and joy overwhelmed me and I began praying in gratitude and apologizing for questioning my faith. I would go on looking at my situation and trials differently. Instead of using them as an excuse to give up and stop trying, I used them as fuel to show myself that I can overcome hard things and learn from my experiences. Rather than expecting things to get worse, I used what I learned to help me overcome more trials that would come my way. After 2 years of fighting for my health, instead of thinking that I would never get better, I appreciated that the savior allowed me to be where I needed to be to receive help from 1 of 10 doctors in the world qualified to help and understand my situation. 



As my testimony and love for my savior grew I started surrounding myself with better influences and people that I know would love and support me. In the back of my head I had a thought to go on a mission but pushed it away anytime it would come up. In a world full of increasing evil and uncertainties, I found it hard to leave. I knew that my testimony was stronger now but didn’t feel ready to give it my all. The lord began to put many obvious signs in my face. My second semester of college I roomed with a recently returned missionary who got up at 6:30 every morning and made sure that I was right there with him. I would talk to him a lot and ask questions about what his experience was like and how he has enjoyed being back home. My other roommates overheating these conversations would join in too, some were also return missionaries. They asked if I had thought about serving, to which I would always reply “not really.” Every Tuesday there would be a school devotional, I didn’t have the opportunity to join them all, but the ones I did attend all happened to be about missions and missionaries sharing their experiences. Friends that I had made decided to serve and were getting their mission calls, others were already back from missions. Finally, while watching April's General Conference. I noticed a recurring theme of missionary work, which led to family, church leaders, and friends asking if I was going to serve. It was just so obvious that the lord wanted me to go and I felt that all my worries would be gone once I made the decision. 



My favorite talk in the general conference was a talk given by Elder Uchtdorf called; “Our Heartfelt All” This talk was about wealthy people and a widow making donations to the temple. The widow only gave 2 mites which at the time was seemingly  worthless, but the savior was very impressed with this offering because she gave her all. Uchtdorf would go on to say; quote “The value of the donation was measured not by the effect it had on the treasury but by the effect it had on the heart of the donor.” close quote. This helped me change the way I viewed serving and made me want to give my all into preparing, serving and teaching like a missionary. Especially when I have nothing to lose. I know that by giving up 2 years of my life to devote my time to serve the lord I will be blessed, and my testimony and experiences will be able to help other people grow and become strong in the church and find their way just as I have. I am honored to serve the Lord and preach the gospel that has brought me so much peace, and to make good memories in Texas. 



I want to close with my testimony. I know that Jesus Christ is our savior and redeemer and all things are possible through him. I know that this church is the true restored gospel on this earth, and I challenge those who may be struggling with their testimonies to seek for the truth and answers. I know that Russell M. Nelson is our living prophet on this earth, and is a mouthpiece for God. I know that through faith, obedience and repentance we can be saved and have everlasting joy and life. And I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ amen. 








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